The Philippian church was a young but strong community of believers who were exhibiting the fruit of real love. Love on its own , however, is not enough. It needs discernment to direct it. So, Paul prays that their love would mature with knowledge and insight. It is possible to do something out of love and find that your intentions were completely misrepresented by your actions. Love wants to meet the needs of others, but discernment is needed to understand those needs. The desire to understand another person is itself an important expression of love. To want to help another person without understanding them is a sign that love is lacking and that perhaps the gesture is more about making oneself feel good. I am talking about those situations in which we offer some kind of help or advice only to meet with a hostile response, and, in response to which we then feel angry and say, “But I was only trying to help”. In most cases, in these situations, the offer of help is misdirected. We feel that we are justified because we are “just trying to help”. But people don’t want help from people who can’t be bothered understanding them. True love involves a level of empathy that enables us to discern what the other person really needs. Learn to take responsibility for how your gestures are received. If you want to understand, then understanding will be given to you. You gain it by listening before acting. I mean really listening, not just to what others say, but discerning what they mean even if they don’t communicate well. That’s true love.
Think about whether you have tried to love without understanding. Ask God to give you greater love and insight.
Read Philippians 1:1-11
