Think twice before you express your anger. Anger can be one of the most self-indulgent emotions. Our first inclination, when we are angry, is to justify our outrage. But even when we are right, it is unlikely that we are right enough to warrant our outrage. In fact, it is often when our anger seems most justified that it is the most self-indulgent and does the most harm. There is a difference between feeling angry and believing that we have a right to be outraged. There is nothing wrong with feeling angry. But moral outrage involves a level of self-righteousness we do not possess. And we certainly are never justified in flying into uncontrolled rage. Uncontrolled rage is never caused by another person. It is always your choice, and you can only overcome anger by taking full responsibility for it. Again, there is nothing wrong with feeling angry. But you always have a choice in how you respond to your anger. If you don’t control it, it will control you. Rage will destroy relationships. But communication brings healing. If you rage at, and accuse another person, you push them away. Express to the other person how you feel without attacking them. That is the key. Accusation and defence make a fight. This is not communication. You can be angry, but you don’t have a right to punish the other person with your manner and with your words. Is there a relationship that has been compromised lately by the way you expressed your anger? Start by taking responsibility for your part in this and then try to communicate and listen. That’s where healing begins.
Ask God to help you in your anger management.
Read James 1:19-27
