So much conflict in life ensues from people trying to get things from other people and feeling frustrated when they can’t. We might schmooze up to one person to get something and attack another person for standing in our way. If a person will not lift us up, we will try to stand on them. These endeavours are often executed with artful subtlety, all hidden below the glossy veneer of social etiquette. The root problem in all this, as I have said before, is that we tend to treat people as means to some higher end rather than ends in themselves. According to Jesus there is nothing more important than relationships (Mark 12:30-31). People are to be loved for themselves, not for their usefulness for some other purpose. There is no higher purpose than love itself. The other problem underlying conflict between people is our alienation from God who is the source of our most fundamental needs. We so often ruin our relationships because we are trying to get from people what can only be received from God, namely, a sense of security and identity. There is a love that the human heart needs which no human being can provide: the love of God. So often we reject relationships because we are looking for identity-validating divine love in human relationships. There is a sense of security that only God can give, and if we expect people to be as reliable as God, we will always end up disappointed and bitter. Our relationship with God is therefore the foundation for our relationships with others.
Ask God to help you receive his love and assurance.
Read James 4:1-3
